Living Under A Scalpel Somewhere

Los Angeles – Joan Rivers, the tight plasticene faced lady that brought stand-up comedy such stellar lines that went something like this, “I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio.”, is still with us. That’s right, folks. That acerbic lip-injected runway schmooze is alive.

Perhaps she is living like Marie Antoinette in her Connecticut estate; or perhaps she is enjoying stroking the head of one of her beloved dogs while looking out of the panorama providing windows of her Manhattan apartment.

Or maybe she is still licking her rejection wounds inflicted by the British public years ago for her outrageous jokes criticizing the monetary compensation to the families of those people that died in the collapsed Twin Towers on September 11, 2001. Ha ha he he.

But, given her propensity for self-mutilation cum cosmetic enhancements, she may just as well be living under a scalpel somewhere.

After her well-documented quip on tape in defense of Israel’s aggression against the Palestinians, which had left scores of women and children dead; she shortly thereafter went to a New York City doctor for her umpteenth try at being presentable to her own mirror. While on the table and under anesthesia, she promptly died from lack of oxygen to the brain. Apparently, her death came quick after that quip; which incidentally was, “they started it!”

Perhaps when Rivers resurfaces, and she will fairly soon, she will regale us with how very funny her exit was. Ha ha he he. Was she taken by gurney out of her doctor’s office from stage left or right? Ha ha he he. The Queen of Cosmetic Mutilation is going to make us all laugh so very hard

On a footnote: That war of aggression by Israel against the Palestinians was a live-action ‘movie’. This being the case, there were no women and children casualties from the actions Rivers was referring to.

And, finally, Word to the Wise: that’s you, our readers – the other dubiously dead include Mick Jagger’s girlfriend, L’Wrenn Scott. You know, the 6-foot 5-inch lady that hung herself on a door knob.

Now, dear readers of Joe & Jane Down the Street, we want you to ponder as we have: are Robin Williams, a purported suicide; Paul Walker, a purported death by car accident blow up; and Philip Seymour Hoffman, a purported expiration from a self-injected junkie’s fix: are they dead?

We here at Joe & Jane know the answers to these questions. We are going to let our readers think them through and determine what the status of these beings are all on your own: with us or not? – Staff

Published: November 22, 2015

Illustration Credit: Joan Rivers: Bromiguel